Monday, August 31, 2015

Labor Day

Many women get anxious during those last weeks of pregnancy and I totally understand why. I would say that most of my pregnancy went by fairly fast but the last few weeks felt that they dragged on as I was anticipating meeting my baby girl. As my due date approached, I also hadn't been experiencing any signs of labor other than some Braxton Hicks contractions. I thought for sure that I would end up having to be induced at 41 weeks as that can often be the case in first pregnancies. Thankfully, I was wrong...

I woke up at 2:30 am on the morning of June 21st with real contractions. This was my due date! I knew these were real contractions because they felt more like menstrual cramps and were more regular than the Braxton Hicks I had previously experienced. I got out of bed and went into the living room where I started timing my contractions and fiddling on the computer to waste time while I waited for the contractions to become more regular. By 4:30 am I was experiencing contractions that were about 4-5 minutes apart. I called my mom to find out if she thought I should head to the hospital and she said that we should. I woke Chadd up and my mom met us at our house and we all headed to the hospital at about 5:30 am. By the time we were checked in at triage, some of my contractions had slowed down. When the nurse checked me, I was only 1cm dilated but she hooked me up to a machine anyway to monitor my contractions for about a half hour. No progress had been made but she knew I didn't live very close to the hospital so she sent me to walk around the hospital for two hours and then told me to come back to triage and we would check my dilation again. It was still pretty early in the morning before the sweltering heat hit so we all decided to walk around the lake in front of the hospital. By the time we returned to triage, I was still only 1cm so they sent me home and told me to go to my OB appt later that day.



After eating some Chicken and Gnocci soup that my mom bought me from Olive Garden, visiting with she and Kourtney for a bit, and bouncing on the exercise ball my sister let me borrow, it was finally time to go to my OB appointment at 3:30pm. Chadd took me to my appointment and they first did an ultrasound as well as a non-stress test to measure my contractions. When Dr. D'heureux checked my dilation, she said I was three to four centimeters dilated. I asked if I could go to the hospital and she said to wait until my contractions were closer to 2-3 minutes apart. She also advised me to take a long walk that night and said that she predicted I'd be back at the hospital later that evening or early the next morning. By 7pm that evening, I started having some contractions that were 1-2 minutes apart and some that were 2-3 minutes apart. They also were increasingly more painful. I told Chadd we needed to leave right away. I was so worried that we wouldn't make it to the hospital that I wouldn't even let him go to a drive thru to get himself dinner on the way. When we finally got to the hospital, I had to wait in triage for an hour and a half. I was pretty embarrassed but the pain had gotten so awful that I was crying in front of everyone in the waiting room. My back hurt so bad and my mom asked for a pillow and was told "pillows are for patients." I didn't understand that as I was about to be a patient. I also didn't understand why I was in obvious pain and it took so long for them to take me to the back. It seemed that they were going in order of who came in first rather than in order of pain level. The triage unit was my only complaint about Winnie Palmer.

Once I was taken back, the nurse checked my dilation and then hooked me up to the machine and said that they would be measuring my contractions for an hour or so. She did not tell me what my dilation was at the time but I assumed I wasn't dilated enough since they wanted to monitor me. The contractions were still really painful but were sporadic and the stretcher they put you on couldn't have been more uncomfortable. The nurse saw the pain I was in and gave me some morphine. This helped a little bit but when asked about my pain level, I told her it was a 7. She wanted to argue with me about that. She said "Oh come on, that's only one below what you said before." Did she not want me to tell the truth about my pain level? My mom and I both didn't really appreciate her snarkiness. One hour turned into several hours probably due to the pain I was experiencing. Only one person was allowed back there with me at a time and my mom and Chadd switched off during that time so that he could get some dinner. When the nurse came back in to check my dilation, she gave me a funny look that I wasn't sure how to read. She asked me "Did you feel your water break?" I told her that I felt a slow trickle a few times but I just associated that as discharge from all of the dilation checks I had that day. She said she was pretty sure my water had broken because she could smell the amniotic fluid when she lifted the blanket to check my dilation. Chadd and I were thrilled with this news because I was worried I wasn't going to be dilated enough and they were going to try and send me home again. She did the check and sure enough, my water had broken, I was 5cm dilated, and she said they would have me in a room in the next fifteen minutes or so. I begged to have an epidural and she said they couldn't do it in triage but would do it immediately when I got to my room.

At about 2:30am, I was finally in my labor and delivery room and within five minutes of being there, the anesthesiologist came in to give me the epidural. I wasn't nervous about the epidural at all; I just wanted the pain from the contractions to go away. Almost immediately after the epidural was given, my pain ceased. At that point I had already been up about 24 hours and everyone was telling me I should get some rest while I could. However, I couldn't believe the relief I felt from the epidural. My adrenaline was going so strong because of that and also the anticipation of meeting my baby girl. Even though I hadn't slept for 24 hours, I knew I wouldn't be able to nap before I began pushing. I rested my eyes for a while and tried but it just did not happen. I was allowed to have three people in my labor room and so it was Chadd, my mom, and his mom, Kim. Around 8:00am that morning is when they checked my dilation and said I was 10cm. Kim and I rushed to do our makeup real quick as we thought Allie would be here fast. I began pushing at around 9:30 but the nurses ended up having to give me Pitocin because my contractions were still irregular. About an hour into pushing, we had to take a break because I had three close contractions in a row and it made Allie's heartrate drop into the 80's. That was terrifying as the nurses rushed to put oxygen on my face. About 11:45am is when I began pushing again. This time they started off with keeping the Pitocin really low as they didn't want to cause any more distress. I pushed for hours upon hours and the nurses kept rotating me in all sorts of positions (back, both sides, even all fours). They also involved this little peanut shaped pillow. Throughout all of this, I vomited quite a few times and my mom laughed because I was like "There goes another $30 dollars." I remembered that the hospital charged Chadd for the container he vomited in when he had an ACL surgery. Anyway, they ended up gradually increasing the Pitocin again throughout the hours of pushing but she was still not progressing through the birth canal. The nurses could see her head and told me she was a blondie. The doctor on call had a C-section he needed to attend to but since my labor was not progressing, he called another doctor from the practice to help with my delivery.

When Dr. Quirino showed up, the nurses caught her up to speed on what had been going on. She immediately did an ultrasound to see what was going on and found out that Allie was sunny side up. She gave me two options. She said she could go ahead and try and turn her and then I could try to push her out for three more contractions. If that did not work, we would go into an emergency C-section. My other option was to just stop labor and schedule a C-section but we could have to wait for hours for a room to open up. She said vacuuming and forceps would not be an option because Allie was still behind the pubic bone. I was fine with that as I would prefer a C-section over those two routes. I was exhausted but wanted to just do what was best for Allie and I didn't want her to be in anymore distress. Everyone told me how far I had come already and that it wouldn't hurt to just try and see if we could turn her and avoid the C-section route. Plus, if it didn't work then I would be able to get the C-section sooner rather than later. As soon as the doctor reached up there to turn her, I experienced immediate regret. Even with an epidural, I have never felt so much pain in my life. I was screaming uncontrollably and crying. Chadd said he almost started to cry when he could see the pain that I was in. My mom was at my bedside praying for us. After the doctor had turned her, she did another ultrasound to check her position. Sure enough, Allie had turned right back to sunny side up. The next few minutes felt like a blur. The emergency team rushed in to get me prepped for surgery. One person was washing my arms and legs and another person even handed me a toothbrush to brush my teeth. I thought that was strange but I didn't ask any questions. At that point, I just wanted my precious baby girl out! The anesthesiologist gave me more medicine and the pressure I had been feeling immediately went away. The team sent Chadd to get dressed in his scrubs and I said goodbye to our mothers before they wheeled me out of the room.

On the way to the room and once in the room, the anesthesiologist could tell how upset I was. The tears were still streaming down my face. He gave me words of encouragement and definitely helped ease my fears. They got started on my surgery and Chadd joined me in the room. I remember the scent of a burning smell and asked what it was. They said they were cauterizing my skin to prevent infection. I will never forget the relief I felt once I heard my sweet baby girl crying. She was born at 3:12pm and was 7.5 lbs and 20.75 inches. They called Chadd over to meet her and watch her get her footprints done but I obviously couldn't move as they were closing me back up. I wish they would have shown her to me over the sheet but they didn't. It felt like forever before I actually got to hold her. Once she was finally in my arms, I couldn't believe the love that I felt for her. It's exactly as people say, "love at first sight." She was even more beautiful than I had imagined. It was a moment I've been dreaming about my entire life. We got a few pictures taken together and then they took her to get cleaned up. The nurses brought her back to me once I was in recovery and I got to feed her for the first time. She immediately latched and I was shocked that it wasn't painful at all. I was kind of like "That's it? This is easy!" After a few hours in recovery, we were wheeled up to my room where we were joined by our parents. They got to see Allie for a little bit but then went home to get some rest as it had been a long couple of days.

We ended up staying in the hospital for 3 more nights and were not discharged until Saturday afternoon. Even though I am not a fan of hospitals, I actually liked being there because all of the nurses were wonderful, knowledgeable, and so helpful with any questions I had regarding Allie and/or my recovery. Not to mention, we had what we were told was one of the nicest views in the hospital-it overlooked both lakes outside. Our visitors included Mom, Dad, Kim, Mark, Melissa, Nanny, Daisy, Sean, Cameron, Kourtney, Christian, Lindsey, Jamie, Justin, Katie, Robin, and Leyton. Although my labor experience was interesting to say the least, we are so fortunate to have a beautiful, healthy, mostly easy-going baby girl!  I was a little worried about how comfortable Chadd was going to be with her as newborns have always made him nervous but he's a pro. It was love at first sight for him too and it just melts my heart to see what an amazing daddy he is. I'm so in love with our little family and I thank God daily for all of our blessings!


























Monday, August 24, 2015

A Dream Realized

I used to be one of those people who felt that they had to have everything planned out. I was married by 23 and planned to start having kids around 25 or 26. My goal was to have all of my children before the age of 30. One thing I've realized about life is that sometimes God has other plans and in the great scheme of things, His plans are often greater than our own.

A couple of years ago, I felt ready to have a child and Chadd and I even tried for about three months. I was so caught up in this ideal plan of mine though that I wasn't really thinking about if he was ready or if our relationship was ready for children. We were high school sweethearts and we had been together ten years. I always considered him my best friend but at the time, we had really grown apart and our lives were going in different directions. For this reason along with many others, we ended up separating from each other for about eight months. During our time apart, I formed a much stronger relationship with Jesus and eventually I felt Him calling me back to Chadd. We started seeing each other again in late October of 2013 and after counseling and a marriage course held at my church, we officially recommitted our lives to each other on April 18, 2014. While no relationship is perfect, ours was now stronger than it had ever been and none of this would have been possible without Jesus.

Skip to November 13, 2014…My period was a few days late and while I didn't really have any other symptoms yet besides fatigue, something in me told me, "This is it! You are pregnant!" I didn't want to tell Chadd until I knew for sure because I had all of these cutesy ideas of how I was going to announce it to him. I went to the store after work that afternoon and picked up a couple of pregnancy tests. I took one right when I got home and it was positive! I immediately cried tears of joy and just thanked God for finally blessing us with a child. Our niece, Daisy was staying with us at the time because her mom and Sean had just had a baby girl of their own the day before. I didn't want to call Chadd on his way home from work and tell him over the phone and didn't want to tell him in front of Daisy so I had to wait until Daisy had gone to bed. Needless to say, it was torturous waiting so long to tell him and my cute announcement ideas were thrown out the window. None of that mattered though. Later that evening while Chadd was lying in bed, I escaped into the bathroom and grabbed the pregnancy test where I secretely stashed it. I came back into the room with my hands behind my back and whipped it right out in front of his eyes. His expression was of total shock. We prayed together that evening; we thanked God for blessing us with a baby and asked Him to keep the baby and myself safe and healthy.

Symptoms: In the first 8 weeks of pregnancy, I didn't have that many symptoms. I was pretty tired and had some pains that felt like menstrual cramps. Those scared me but my friend who was also pregnant experienced them too and the Dr. told me they are totally normal. It's weird that no one talks about those. From weeks 9 to about 22, I struggled with nausea and vomiting. I felt nauseous everyday but the vomiting was only maybe 2 to 3 days a week so it wasn't unbearable. There was one time though that Dirk, Chadd, and I were headed to the Orlando Improv to see Dave Coulier perform. We stopped at the Chick Fil A on University and had dinner before heading on the highway. I started feeling really nauseous on 417 and by the time we hit I4, I told my brother he needed to pull over. I guess he didn't feel comfortable pulling over so he got off on the next exit instead. Well...by that time, it was too late. There were two styrofoam cups next to me in the car and they both ended up full of vomit, along with my jeans. Dirk's car remained unscathed though and for that, I was pretty proud of myself! It was around week 21 that I first started feeling the flutters and within a few weeks, I could start feeling her movements, kicks, and hiccups. I lived for these moments! The greatest joy in pregnancy is being able to feel your baby move inside of you. During the last few months of my pregnancy, the nausea subsided but what replaced it was "acid throat" and upper back pains. I didn't really have heartburn...it was just exactly as I stated it, acid sitting in my throat. Nothing really
helped either of these things but it was better than the constant nausea for sure. I'm also typically someone who enjoys cardio and prior to pregnancy, I would usually go to the gym three times a week. Other than walking, I really didn't exercise throughout pregnancy due to the fatigue and nausea.  Pregnancy is not glamorous but it is an experience I am eternally grateful for and look forward to experiencing again. Not only is it amazing to feel so close to your baby but another one of my favorite things was watching my belly grow and taking pictures of the week by week progress.

Finding out the sex: I have such a close relationship with my mom and I have been looking forward to having a baby girl because I hope to emulate a lot of my mom's qualities and have the same type of bond with my daughter. This was my first child and though I know I would have been elated whether it was a girl or boy...I definitely was hoping and had a feeling our baby was a girl. At our week 12 ultrasound, Chadd asked if the ultrasound tech saw a penis and she said "I'd be surprised to ever see a penis." This was our first clue that my intuition was right but I knew that twelve weeks was a little too soon to tell. At week 16, my suspicions were confirmed and we were told we were having a baby girl. They showed us the little "hamburger" on the ultrasound. I immediately called our close family members and texted my friends to share the news! It was a good thing too because we had already agreed upon the name, Allie Grace and we did not see eye to eye on boy names. I was so excited that I went and bought her first outfit that night! It was a white polka-dotted denim romper with little white eyelet shoes and a white eyelet bow. I also rallied our dogs, Lily and Kenzie and took several pictures so I could make a Facebook announcement and share my excitement with everyone else!

Cravings/Aversions: I really didn't crave much during pregnancy and definitely never had any of those unusual cravings that people talk about like pickles and ice cream mixed together. While I was dealing with the nausea, my diet pretty much only consisted of grilled cheese sandwiches. I only really craved cold foods/drinks like coke flavored ICEEs, strawberry banana smoothies, flavor ice pops, and Jeremiah's Scoop Froggy Frog with chocolate/vanilla swirl. Unfortunately, I could not stomach vegetables. It appeared that I reverted back to my childhood days. However, I did still enjoy fruit and I just made sure I was consistent with taking my prenatal vitamins daily so Allie still would get all of the nutrients she needed.

Favorite Moments: 

  • Finding out I was pregnant and sharing the news
  • Getting to see Allie on all of the ultrasounds and hearing her heartbeat at my appointments
  • Preparing her beautiful purple/teal nursery with Chadd and my mom
  • Reading "Oh Baby, The Places You'll Go" and feeling her kick
  • Both of my baby showers thrown by my lovely sister, Melissa and Chadd's grandmother, Linda
  • Experiencing pregnancy with my best friend, Kourtney


Even though my timeline did not happen in the original way that I had planned, I am so thankful to God for that. He knew what he was doing. I have changed and grown so much in my faith and as a person in the last couple of years. I've always dreamed about being a mother and now that it is a reality, I cannot even express how overjoyed I am. I just look at my daughter sometimes and begin to cry tears of happiness. My wish for Allie is that she always knows how much she is loved by her father and I, the rest of the family, and most of all, Jesus. I hope that she loves Jesus fiercely and that her love for him will outpour and inspire others. I know that she will have some struggles along the way but I hope that she will always lean on God during these times. Finally, just as my dream of having her came true, I hope that all of her dreams in life are realized!